Of course, we all respond to different healers, and a someone who is a healer for me might not be a healer for you. It also depends on our receptivity at the time we see someone, as well as factors too complicated and mysterious to fully uncover which have to do with why something heals when it does. Nevertheless, this acupuncturist was definitely a healer for me. As I left his office, I thought “this is a true healer” and started to think about the qualities that make for a good healer and positive healing experience. Since I’ve heard other people in my area call him a healer as well, I felt it was worth exploring the qualities that are present in an effective healer.

Here are some of the things I came up with, and I’d be interesting in what others might add to the list:

• Is non-judgmental. I felt completely accepted and did not feel like I was being judged in any way.
• Makes life-supporting, positive statements. He spoke of his findings in positive terms. For example, he might say “your core issue is with this chakra and I’ll give that some attention”, rather than “this chakra is clogged up and blocked”. None of his statements created a sense of alarm or fear or discouragement. He never made me feel “broken” in any way.
• Is supportive without being emotionally reactive.
• Cares without being emotionally involved.
• Is self-confident and yet humble.
• Creates a sense of safety and trust.
• Works in partnership with you. Honors your thoughts and perceptions.
• Is not attached to the outcome of the work.
• Is open to questions.
• Listens deeply.

As I wrote this list, I realized how difficult it is to describe exactly what makes someone a good healer. There is a quality of “presence” that is impossible to describe. Something about them invokes a “healing response” in you. Perhaps the best way to identify a true healer is to tune into how you respond to someone. Healing is much more likely to happen if the healer makes you feel relaxed and safe, so that you are open and receptive to their treatments.

I’m also struck by the fact that I never mentioned this healer’s expertise in acupuncture. He is obviously very skilled both in acupuncture and energy therapy (he used hands-on energy healing as well as acupuncture). My sense is that while technical skill is very important, in many cases it will be useless if the healer’s personality does not allow you to be receptive.